Today I received this question from a video viewer. I thought that the question and answer are significant enough to post here.
Question: Can the big space “I”- the blank I – also disappear, like everything that arises within it? In my experience, this “I” is the only thing I ever feel, and so in my seeking there is nothing left to do. However,
there is the lingering suspicion that this bubble that circumscribes the entire world can itself pop. If it can, is this something I can “choose” to do? It seems like this would not be the case, as any choice is a fleeting movement in the immutable “I.” Perhaps it will choose in its own time when to unravel itself?
Thank you so much, Love
My Answer: Hello George.
My experience is that in deep meditation, all forms recede into the Light of our Consciousness and only the singular Light of Consciousness remains. In this dimension, there is no mind activity – no reflective nature of a personal self. There is only the awareness of the Light as everything. There is no understanding of time or space. There is only being the unchanging Light. Once the understanding of “I am this” or “I am here” happens, this dimension fades from awareness because the personal self has returned.
I theoretically believe that there is a dimension of reality beyond this. I believe that this dimension does exist but have not consciously experienced this dimension. If the Light of Consciousness vanishes then there is no longer any form to be aware of. There would only be empty awareness. Without any “thing” to perceive, there is no experience happening. So there would never be knowledge of what this dimension is. There would only be the experience of going beyond the Light of Consciousness dimension and then returning to it….not knowing what happened during this lapse… if even a lapse is recognized because there is no self-reflective awareness (no personal self) in this Light of Consciousness dimension. Because I am not aware of any such lapse, I cannot say if I have ever experienced this theoretical dimension of Awareness alone. Maybe one day this will happen. I cannot say for sure.
I theoretically believe that this Awareness / “emptiness that perceives” cannot be removed. The expression of form arising inside of it can be removed but I doubt that It can be removed. When the forms are removed, including the Light of Consciousness dimension, then essentially nothing exists because nothing is experienced any longer. Everything has disappeared and it’s as if nothing ever was (because there is no form to be aware of, not even memory). Essentially though, this Awareness could not itself vanish – or else there is no other Power to recreate it. One could say that the Power is the Awareness. They are the same. By the rules of logic there must be one all-remaining “Source” that exists even when the forms exists. And this “Source” may know itself even when all the forms vanish. The “Source” cannot uncreate itself because there would be nothing to recreate it. So the Source must remain as the Awareness, yet have no experience when the forms all vanish. The Power is the Awareness.
We can take this theoretical argument and apply it to our personal experience and see that there are essentially 2 sides of Self / Source. There is the side with Awareness and Form – i.e., the Universe and all of it’s dimensions (causal, astral, material). This side will always exist as “the known” aspect of Self / Source. There is the side of Awareness without Form. This side will never have any experience but will always exist. This is the “unknowable” aspect. Both of these sides always exist in every moment. Yet only the “unknowable” side is absolute – meaning that it can never stop existing. Because it is unknowable it is a mystery, yet it is real. We will never understand It directly (as Awareness alone) but we can understand It because it exists with the Forms and therefore can be experienced. We experience ourselves as Awareness and the Forms within us. Form shows us that We exist.
I speedily typed this response to you. I hope that my words were clear. If I missed any parts or areas were unclear, please ask. If you’d like to share your experience. I will read and reply as time permits.
Blessings and Love